Life is in the pits.
i’m falling into depression again…i need to be checked in at the mental hospital..seriously.
it’s all the pressure…the insecurities…the worries…all the crap…it’s really getting to me,and i have a hard time just shrugging it off and say,"yabadabadoo!i can handle anything!"
i mean, my whole future is just within my reach.and the striking truth to that is really scary.what if i failed to grasp it?i’m really just so confused right now.
sigh.
and there’s my insecurities.sometimes,i’m just not happy with who i am,i just want to be someone totally different,and i think people,especially those who are dear to me, will be happier with that.i wish i was someone who’s truly confident in her own skin,and not fret about anything.i wish i was someone smarter and braver and sexier (hell yeah!) and……..richer.i’m not being materialistic here,but,come to think of it,money does really make the world go ’round.if you have lots of it,you can help your own family,and a lot of other people:those who are sick,the poor,victims of crime…waaaaah.on second thought,baka kunin ako ni Lord nito.Wag po!wag po!knock on wood!!!!
oh,and with lots of money, i can make my man feel truly special by whisking him off to some deserted island and cover him in whipped cream…ah,just kidding,there’s absolutely no truth to what was aforementioned..umm…well.I’M JUST KIDDING,GET THE POINT?!duh…
GOING BACK TO WHAT I WAS BLABBERING ABOUT,if i were rich,i’d be able to whisk my man off in different places like the beach or something and just have a romantic and fun time with him each moment we’re together….
so to all rich kids out there…don’t just go wasting your precious money in something useless or don’t try to flaunt it to others…hey,your folks worked real hard for it,learn to appreciate the REAL value of THAT…
and as for me…well,let’s just say someday i’m gonna build my own beach resort…so my man and i could just lie lazily on the sand and watch the sunset together…
ok,enough of this daydreaming.i need to haul my butt off this chair and start reviewing!!!
p.s. i love you dadi…as always.
